Business

How many of you have postulated for hours on a single amazing concept for your ideal job? I have many many interesting deliberations on the nature of my ideal small buisness - were I to own one. A B & B, a Comic Shop, a Summer Camp, a Gamer's lounge that wasn't a craphole, heck, I've even absently pondered selling snippets of rhyme on a street corner. Why not?

Imagine how much nicer life would be if we could work the jobs we wanted? How much LESS stress there would be in the world? How much less teeth grindng, finger picking, nail biting, hives springing up, sleep being deprived, frustrated tears, aggitated fights with the ones you love, ditching your friends to work or sleep and complain there would be??

And though I would never get accepted for a small buisness loan, THT is why I would want to try and take oneo ut. There's gatta be something I can do that I love that will actually pay me, right?

Right?

Oru

Stable Insecurity?

I am so happy right now.

I have a place of my own, steady income, a man who loves me, creative outlets, and tons of friends and family nearby. Socially and mentally speaking I am fantastic. I have vivid dreams (haha) and fun ideas, I create worlds and peoples and I step into their shoes to unwind from reality. I get along with most of my co-workers, laugh and smile a lot, have wonderful neighbors and a lizard that is mind-numbingly entertaining. I am physically healthy and suffer no lon-term ailments other than pretty crappy vision, and I've been told that I'm a sweet kind of attractive. I don't have anything about my body to complain about (Mentally is another story, hehe) and I am satisfied with my wardrobe. I also have amazing sex, which is very, very healthy I hear.

MOnetarily speaking... I suppose thats where the insecurity comes from. Those minor expenditures, and those major purchases that are necessary for my continued happiness (IE Gas, rent, The Pill, groceries, oil changes, painkillers & cold meds, the $1.65 I pay every few days for a tea and therefore internet, etc...) seem to get in the way of those major monthly payments that cover all the minute details I learned/didn't learn in College. They say nothing is free? Well unfortunately in my case thats about 95% true. The whole experience of school is costing me approximately 50,000 in the long run - not including interest.

Why on earth does it cost so much to learn? Who the hell thought of that? What kind of arrogant idiot thought he could monopolize an education? We learn for free every day. Should our parents start chargind us for when they teach us to tie our shoes, or ride our bikes? What makes higher education so damned expensive? And what the hell did I waste my money on? Maybe the C in Math, or the B in Memoirs? Or maybe I'm paying for the parties I went to after each show I was in? Or the few times I operated a metal cutter? Or how about this: "The College Experience?" Did I really just PAY for friendship and comradrie? Am i STILL paying for it? Because if thats all it was, it was barely BARELY worth it.

a.) True friends are free, and I like to think of my college friends as very true. So I should get a discount for that.

b.) I got C's in Math all the freakin time, so I apparently learned nothing there. discount.

c.) I've BEEN to better parties both before AND after college, so it wasn't exactly a learning experience OR worth that much cash. Discount there.

d.) If I recall, the metal cutting gig was actually VOLUNTEER. DISCOUNT ME.

e.) And the College Experience? The extenuation of high school mixed in with a longer drive from home and living on one's own? I've BEEN to summer camp, thank you, done that. Gimme a damned discount!

So I am happy. Truly, very happy with my situation. Now to be SECURE... well, Lemme re-iterate our dear friend from "The Continuation - The Conclusion" ...

Stripping, egg donating or winning the lottery would just be grand. (The later prefered, thank you.)

Oru

Aches and Pains

Tell me if you've experienced this.

You work a few days in a row - about 5. Early morning, you wake up after a late night (Because when else will you be able to socialize?) The Am doesn't seem to agree with you, and you bicker back and forth to try and free your trembling and exhausted muscles. You bargain - I'll take a shower if you just relax? Or I'll eat some breakfast if you pry my eyes open a little? You then drive to your job, windows open, music blaring, anything to keep yourself awake, and when you do get there, you pry yourself out of the driver's seat and trudge inside to report for duty, as it were.

And then the standing starts. And from the heels and flat of your foot to your knees, to your hips and to the base of your spine, and from there to between your shoulderblades and down the crook of your elbow, and the base of your skull oozes up this dull, uncomfortable throb. You find yourself shifting your weight, pacing, trying to shift the ache, dislodge it, distract yourself from it, but it doesn't seem to work. And when you look at the clock you realize that only about 2 hours of your 8 hour shift have gone by and you barely think you're gonna make it.

Anyone with me on this?

I think it's both keeping wonky hours and the amount of stress that keeps you tossing and turning at night. Those bouncing, unruly thoughts in your noggin are just as tiring as running a marathon, and when both ming AND body are exhausted, well what can you do?

I indulge in some nightly RP. (Yes. I do. I am proud of it, thank you.) I escape for a little while, and while that adventure is still in my head, I konk out, unable to keep my eyes open any longer. Or, for those of you less nerd-inclined, pop in a movie and watch until your eyes close and you dream about whats going on in the film. Or, if you have the capability (which I don't) take a nice hot bath, burn some scented candles, or play video games. OR you can be like my brother and go beat something up, chop down a tree, or build a rock wall.

Bottom line - SOME form of stress relief is KEY to better, happier life.

And less aches and pains.

Oru