I am not as eloquent as my friend who constructs the Imaginarium Terrarium. I don't find myself as interesting as the delightful mind behind The Continuation - The Conclusion. And I am most certainly not as savvy as Young, Broke and Married. As a matter of fact, I'm really not sure what it is i bring to Blogspot that would pull me out among thousands of like-minded individuals. There are tons more people with far better word form then I, better grammar, helluva better spelling, and probably of a happier disposition... I am convinced that my friends love me far too much to indulge in reading this in their off time - but I thank them TONs for doing so.
Today is the kind of day where I want to succeed in something. Not just making it through the day or doing well in a job I hate. I want to do something I love and look back at it and feel that delicious sense of accomplishment that comes with so few things now a days. It is Brilliant outside. Sunny, with gusting winds that throw your hair freakin everywhere. JUST enough cloud cover to sometimes give you a moment of shade. Picnic? No problem. Badminton? of course! Poetry beneath your favorite tree? Naturally! This is one of those days that I want to get a better job and lift my chin in pride for being able to afford everything on my own. This is one of those days where I want to write something that is worth your time reading this.
Times like this I want to be able to wow you.
And sometimes I feel like I am able. My fingertips practically explode on contact with this keyboard, and floods will power through the circuitry and bloom in muddy waves on the shores of this cyberspace meeting ground.
Then of course, there are days like today where I feel like I'm simply writing the same things over and over. Should I erase this whole thing and start b*tching about work, instead? It might be funny! But I do that all the time in REAL life, why would I want to just keep beating a dead horse?
Originally, I tried to come up with a theme for this blog. On this cursed Brilliant Day, I've decided that the theme is redundant emo-ness.
I apologize. So. Much.
Oru
Monday, July 26, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Drift
Prepare for a bit of rambling.
When I suffer from a lack of sleep, I tend to let my mind wander where it shouldn't supposed to. I'm usually there to hold it's hand. But like a negligent parent - in mysleep deprived stupor, I don'teven think about where it is.
Until It stumbles and falls down the stairs - or wanders outside. This is where the bizarre analogy ends though. Because when my mind falls down the metaphorical set of stairs, I kind of just watch it. Like I'm in a drug induced coma. (Ok, that part could be compared to a REALLY negligent parent.) I wait in terror for it to hit the bottom and stop moving. Wondering if it will, in fact, die. Or in the case of my mind anyway - Maybe surrender. Give in. Like a car crash. They say if you remain totally relaxed, you suffer less damage. Or something.
But the falling itself? Fallingis always fun. It'sthe landing people don't like. Which I tend to agree with in physical terms. But mentally? I think landing provides closure, don't you?
But I digress. And if the childof my mind were to wander outside - UNLIKE the negligent parent scenario, it's reallymore of an awestruck fascination. I wonder where it will meander to - and sometimes It could sit for hours staring at one brilliant thought, one glimmering hope, or one shining idea. And those moments are the verty best part about being sleep deprived.
The end.
Oru
When I suffer from a lack of sleep, I tend to let my mind wander where it shouldn't supposed to. I'm usually there to hold it's hand. But like a negligent parent - in mysleep deprived stupor, I don'teven think about where it is.
Until It stumbles and falls down the stairs - or wanders outside. This is where the bizarre analogy ends though. Because when my mind falls down the metaphorical set of stairs, I kind of just watch it. Like I'm in a drug induced coma. (Ok, that part could be compared to a REALLY negligent parent.) I wait in terror for it to hit the bottom and stop moving. Wondering if it will, in fact, die. Or in the case of my mind anyway - Maybe surrender. Give in. Like a car crash. They say if you remain totally relaxed, you suffer less damage. Or something.
But the falling itself? Fallingis always fun. It'sthe landing people don't like. Which I tend to agree with in physical terms. But mentally? I think landing provides closure, don't you?
But I digress. And if the childof my mind were to wander outside - UNLIKE the negligent parent scenario, it's reallymore of an awestruck fascination. I wonder where it will meander to - and sometimes It could sit for hours staring at one brilliant thought, one glimmering hope, or one shining idea. And those moments are the verty best part about being sleep deprived.
The end.
Oru
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Slow Burst
It blossoms in the back of my mind
a thought like a solarflare
lashing out and then slowly,
like the lingering orb of
light
after the flash goes off,
descends, and illuminates
and roils
and thrums
in the Earth at my feet
trembling my bones against
cages of sinew
muscle
flesh
blood
and meat.
a thought like a solarflare
lashing out and then slowly,
like the lingering orb of
light
after the flash goes off,
descends, and illuminates
and roils
and thrums
in the Earth at my feet
trembling my bones against
cages of sinew
muscle
flesh
blood
and meat.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
To My Dear Followers,
Not many of you read my blog, I understand. However, to those that do - let's take a moment to wish one of my greatest followers (The one, the only, the currently damaged but healing Flisser) A speedy, mostly painless, and drug induced recovery!
This is a lesson.
And I hate it that it takes a friend eating handlebars to wake us up, here. You see, a good portion of the time I find myself doing the "Well if they want to hang out, they'll call me," thing. Neglecting the fact that I want to see these people, I find ways to content myself in thinking that they will talk to me when they want to hang out.
The lesson here? CALL PEOPLE. I'm going to do my best to return the favors of people calling me, and checkin in on me, and just showing a general interest.... Because what If I miss something else? What if things hadn't turned out as ok, and I didn't even know about it? I would have missed it because of my OWN neglect, not because they didn't feel like calling me. Just like this event with Fliss.
We are so sorry we weren't there sooner, Fliss. And I know you told us that 'it was cool' but I still wish we'd been there. And I know my love feels the same way. You're damn right we'll be harrassing the shit out of you for hang-out time, just you wait :)
So please accept this as a formal apology for being distant and unreachable at times. Yes, we do care, very much, and we want to hang out, and we have no excuse. This is my vow to return phone calls.
So in any case...
Love you
Oru
This is a lesson.
And I hate it that it takes a friend eating handlebars to wake us up, here. You see, a good portion of the time I find myself doing the "Well if they want to hang out, they'll call me," thing. Neglecting the fact that I want to see these people, I find ways to content myself in thinking that they will talk to me when they want to hang out.
The lesson here? CALL PEOPLE. I'm going to do my best to return the favors of people calling me, and checkin in on me, and just showing a general interest.... Because what If I miss something else? What if things hadn't turned out as ok, and I didn't even know about it? I would have missed it because of my OWN neglect, not because they didn't feel like calling me. Just like this event with Fliss.
We are so sorry we weren't there sooner, Fliss. And I know you told us that 'it was cool' but I still wish we'd been there. And I know my love feels the same way. You're damn right we'll be harrassing the shit out of you for hang-out time, just you wait :)
So please accept this as a formal apology for being distant and unreachable at times. Yes, we do care, very much, and we want to hang out, and we have no excuse. This is my vow to return phone calls.
So in any case...
Love you
Oru
Friday, July 2, 2010
Best Love Ever
So Yesterday was rough for me. I had work ('nuff said) and then I had to run over to my OTHER job before I ran back to the appartment, got a bottle of wine, then ran down to Garrison to see a (great) play at Boscobel. (Shakespeare, Naturally.) THEN Of course, after that, hope that I made it hope in enough time to have enough energy to hang out for a bit before I was required by my biological clock to crash and burn until this morning.
Well, the break between that day of here and there was of course, the running home bit. So, I did so, and when I pull in, I realize that there's a whole lot of garbage outside. Interesting. And in OUR garbage can as well. Double interesting. And as I get out of my car, my Love approaches, grinning fiendishly. He finishes up a conversation on the phone and then gives me a hug, then starts to lead me upstairs, saying, "You're going to hate me, I know you're going to hate me."
I get suspiscious, of course, at first. But then I go with it. And when i turn the corner to see our living space - I see that the man had cleaned everything. Threw out all the trash, reorganized the bookshelves (In our bizarre way of 'reorganizing') and cleared the floor od all debris!
My Love got much praise. And then I left and then I came back and was locked out of the appartment because my love is forgetful and fancies himself a catburglar. (It's fun to puzzle it out, ladies and gents.)
Our key last night consisted of a crowbar, a garden spade and a cutco mini-carver.
In any case, My love has taken upon himself to fix and/or replace the lock for us this morning before work!
Pros:
He will NEVER forget his keys again. Ever.
Our door closes and opens without getting stuck now. I think it had something to do with the levering process via crowbar.
I like shiny things
Best Love Ever.
Oru
Well, the break between that day of here and there was of course, the running home bit. So, I did so, and when I pull in, I realize that there's a whole lot of garbage outside. Interesting. And in OUR garbage can as well. Double interesting. And as I get out of my car, my Love approaches, grinning fiendishly. He finishes up a conversation on the phone and then gives me a hug, then starts to lead me upstairs, saying, "You're going to hate me, I know you're going to hate me."
I get suspiscious, of course, at first. But then I go with it. And when i turn the corner to see our living space - I see that the man had cleaned everything. Threw out all the trash, reorganized the bookshelves (In our bizarre way of 'reorganizing') and cleared the floor od all debris!
My Love got much praise. And then I left and then I came back and was locked out of the appartment because my love is forgetful and fancies himself a catburglar. (It's fun to puzzle it out, ladies and gents.)
Our key last night consisted of a crowbar, a garden spade and a cutco mini-carver.
In any case, My love has taken upon himself to fix and/or replace the lock for us this morning before work!
Pros:
He will NEVER forget his keys again. Ever.
Our door closes and opens without getting stuck now. I think it had something to do with the levering process via crowbar.
I like shiny things
Best Love Ever.
Oru
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