Good Things

 A friend of mine makes lists of all the good things they did or saw or experienced in a day. I think thats a beautiful idea, and I'm hoping it will help with my general lack of feeling, so here we go!

1. I bonded with a co-worker today! She's really nice, and we chatted about hair dye and girlfriends.

2. Several people got really excited about a Discord Role-play that I pitched, and they already started making characters even though I don't know if it's ready yet.

3. The gas station attendant was really nice to me, and remembered what kind of Vape Pods I use.

4. My doggos are absolutely adorable.

5. My Fiancé is absolutely adorable.

6. it was almost 80 degrees today! Which, I'm not sure is a good thing, as it kinda irritated me, BUT I was able to show off a funny T-shirt at work because of it!

7. I have DnD tonight with some good friends!

Silhouette

I am silhouetted.

The line if my jaw uninterrupted,

The slope of my nose goes carefully down,

One hand, you can see, smooths down the side of my blouse.

A stunning first impression, there.

My best side forward,

Just enough to catch the sparkle at the corner of my eye.

But I am not a whole thing

I am not just this image here, silly side-eye and a smirk,

I am a broken thing, missing parts.

You cannot see it from this angle, I won't let you.

I don't want you to see the empty socket past the curve of my nose.

The ticking anxious muscle past the line of my jaw.

The other hand with trembling fingers poised to defend.

The cracked and crumbling bits that hold up that last sparkling smile.

I am Silhouetted.

Stress

 My anxiety is going off the RAILS here. 

Never been on a plane by myself before. 

Never gone to meet people without a safety net.

I'm terrified they're going to dislike me. Not hate. I don't think they could hate me. But I'm afraid that they aren't going to LIKE me. That I'm going to be a huge disappointment. A let down. A boring, lame, lack-luster new acquaintance.

Help.